Bat Face Poo

I was taking photos, trying to find a nice piece for a close-up, and this one leapt out at me. I thought it looked like a bat’s face, so I added some eyes and voila! Note: I didn’t sculpt the piece of poo. It came out like this.

Close-Up

Here’s a close-up of part of the Meatballs Poo. Do you think it looks like a chocolate-covered raisin? I do. Or a tongue. A big tongue of poo. Okay, let’s go closer:

Now I’m thinking asteroid, or aerial photo of a mud-slide. Or the back of a brown lizard. Or a diseased brain… But look how moist it is!!!!

The Meatballs Poo

This poo isn’t shy. This one’s very relaxed, and happy to state at me for as long as I want to stare at it. It likes having its photo taken, and it doesn’t particularly want to get flushed – although it’s not making a fuss, and will happily go with the flow when the time come. Which it did. I wonder where the Meatballs Poo is now?

The Chilli Poo

This one was caused by a chilli, and to me it looks somewhat furtive, like it can’t wait to get through the U-bend and is desperate for me to pull the handle. But I waited long enough to take this photo. For some reason, this struck me as a shy poo…

The Salmon and Biscuits Poo

Salmon is very healthy, biscuits perhaps less so. Even ginger biscuits. The poo above is a result of both these substances having been consumed in the past day. Plus some Coke. I must say, it’s rare for me to produce skid marks like that in the bowl. Perhaps I was sitting further forward on the seat that usual? I had to get the toilet brush out for this one…

The Tentative Eggs Poo

After over a week of abstinence, I finally ate eggs again. Poached, with salmon. Three eggs, to be precise. And a few hours later, this came out. Not too bad. However, I’ve noticed – from looking back over this blog so far – that I seem to lack a consistent style. I’d rather have a regular poo type, but it seems very random. Perhaps my diet is more varied than I thought?

The Biscuit Poo

Looking at a poo is a bit like taking a Rorschach Test. You notice odd shapes of things, and suddenly that’s all you can see. Above, I see a chicken wing on the right. Consequently, the whole thing now looks to me like a chicken. I haven’t actually eaten chicken for weeks. I don’t mind it, but it’s not something I’m too keen on. The poo above is probably the result of a stir fry last night, plus some Coke and a few biscuits. But still, what I see is a chicken

The Immediate Post Eggs Poo

I ate eggs again! And this happened! 🙂 Actually, I think the key to the whole thing is Coca Cola, which seems to get things moving. This poo is photographed from quite an unusual angle. It was actually quite long. But yes, eggs (and salmon) on bread for lunch, a glass of Coke, and look what happened.

The Second Poo of the Day

From constipation to having two poos in one day! This one was easy. Since the previous poo, all I’ve eaten is some Bran Flakes, plus there have been about 10 cups of tea. I’m really tempted to have some eggs now, but I think I’ll leave it a couple more days. Still, with this blog having started with irregular habits, it looks like things are becoming more stable and healthy 🙂

The Mussels Poo

It’s been a week since I had any eggs, and things are getting more regular. The above was the result of a sandwich at lunchtime and then, later, a bowl of mussels. We’re back to one a day now, which is a relief. I’m also drinking a lot less alcohol (especially wine!) which I imagine is having a significant effect. Hmm. As much as I love eggs, I’m delaying another portion for a few more days…